Goodbye Summer Rentals!

When the summer season ends, so does the weekly tenants for our three vacation rentals. After this, our income takes a dive. Enter phase two, scrambling for winter rentals. The weird thing about Cooperstown though is that we have had pretty good luck with finding nice tenants for the winter season. Each year from Sept. - May we have people stay for a variety of reasons. Sometimes someone is building a home, sometimes they are interning at The Hall of Fame, some are traveling nurses at Bassett Hospital. There are lots of different reasons why someone needs a home for only 8 or 9 months. 

This past week we got a call from one of these people. George was going to meet him to show him the apartment on Saturday. Since this person was going to be living next door to me for the next 9 months, I had a lot of questions. Now George, always ready to pimp out our places, had asked all the right questions before he was to meet him. But the problem was, he got all the wrong answers AND he was still showing him the place. He was going to give him the benefit of the doubt. I on the other hand was not!

Where do you live now?

Why are you coming up here?
"I need to relocate."

How will you pay the rent?
"I get a check from social security."
    Sounded pretty young to get social security.

Can it cover the rent?
"No, but my mother also gets social security and she will be living with me."
    Your... mother. Wow.... this is looking... better by the minute. You did say... your mother, right?

Can that cover the rent?
"No, but my wife is a model."
    A model... Of course, she is.   

Well what is her weekly salary?
"Well... nothing right now. She is pregnant."
    Well, there now, it just got worse.

So how do you plan on paying for the rent?
"I have a website that could bring in $4,000/month."
    COULD bring in $4,000, not DOES bring in. I COULD win the lottery this month too.

What is the website?
"You could go to my website to see what I look like - www....... "
    (as he was saying it, I was typing it in. What a surprise! There was no such website!)
    No, not really a surprise. But boy was I curious to see this guy.

You know we are renting the place weekly starting June 1st, so you would have to vacate by then?
"Oh yes, we are going to buy a house and move out by then."
    Because that $4,000/month website is really going to help with that deposit on a house!
Now all of this and George was still planning on meeting him. Could any tenant be worse! He actually had me type up a new contract to bring with him. With added reasons why someone could be evicted! One of the reasons was - "If there is excessive yelling, this is reason for eviction." LOL, excessive yelling. You think these people are going to be fighting and you still want to meet him? Can't cover the rent, husband and pregnant wife and mother in law in same apartment = possible fighting, non-existent website, relocation, no real reason to ever leave. Now if these aren't red flags. Forget about red flag, this was a freaking rainbow colored flag flapping in George's face. 

So here I stood in my pimp of a husband's way, with my "No way, this is where I draw the line!" look on my face. Well actually it was more than a look. I think I said the word NO about 20 times in 5 minutes. But he's used to that.

"You know I gotta be honest with you. This really doesn't look good, and it would probably be better if you found another place," George said. Thank you George!

It's a long cold winter up here, and I think these neighbors/tenants were going to make it a lot longer!

6 Responses
  1. Jean Says:

    OMG Tina -- We know how multi-talented George is, but pimping was not included in the mix!!

    Thank God he said NO -- I agree there were MULTIPLE flags waving NO.

    Good luck!!

    By the way, the post before this was hillarious!!! Hello????

    Love, Jean

  2. Anonymous Says:

    Dear Tina,
    As you probably already know but may be trying hard to forget, the SGW group is due to arrive mid-October. I would like to reserve one tall, dark, and extremely handsome pimp and glutin filled pancakes as well as beautiful autumn leaves and a partridge in a pear tree.
    I can't wait to see you and I am planning to bring a life time supply of Xanax.

  3. Can't wait to see you both!
    Ps. I am assuming the previous post was from Marsha. I am guessing the Xanax kicked in just as you were writing Love,

  4. Anonymous Says:

    Dear Tina,

  5. tunk Says:

    Tina, you are at once a good writer, and also so lucky to be with Georgie. It sounds like a kind of good cop/bad cop routine, i didna say Abbott&Costello. I'd like you both to see Local Hero again. if you haven't seen it yet, tell me what you think.

  6. Thanks Ty! We have seen Local Hero, but so long ago. I remember liking it, but my Alzheimers has kicked in since then, so that's about all I remember :/. I will Netflix it.
    Hope all is well,